Wasn’t Expecting THAT to Happen!
Are you a person who takes her time to accomplish tasks, methodically going step-by-step until it’s done, or do you like me, wait until the very last minute and knock it out just barely before the buzzer rings?
When you are training for a bodybuilding competition, there is something to be said about the former way of training rather than the latter. Because when you, “hypothetically” – not saying that I’ve ever done this, wait until the very last minute to cut your carbs because carbs represent all that is good on this green Earth, you may not be 100% thrilled with what you look like when you stand on stage the day of the show.
Which is why for my next competition prep I decided to give myself an extra month to get ready, take it from 12 weeks of prep time to 16 weeks. Not to brag, but I was very impressed with myself for adulting so well in this regard.
And that’s when my doctor told me that I would be getting stitches on my foot.
You see, in keeping with the adulting theme, I made an appointment with the dermatologist to get a funky mole between my toes checked out because a) who the hell gets a mole between her toes? and b) I already had Mohls surgery once so I’m always on the lookout for pre-cancerous looking things that like to appear on my body.
I was thinking that she would freeze that bad boy and I’d be on my merry way, but after measuring it and photographing it she said I’d need stitches and would have to stay off my feet.
“I’m a bodybuilder and have a competition coming up in 16 weeks, so how long is this going to take to heal?” I asked, slight panic seeping in.
“A bodybuilder? You don’t do tanning beds do you?”
“No. Just spray on and I use SPF50. This is probably from when I was 20 and fell aside on a beach and woke up with sun poisoning. I knew it would catch up with me one day, but I was hoping it would be in my 80s, not 40s.”
“Yeah, it can catch up with you. So, no cardio for at least two weeks. No impact exercises, no running, no heavy lifting where you’re putting pressure on your feet,” she explained, “because the feet and the legs take longer to heal.”
I was feeling really pouty about this, but you know what they say: “Nothing distracts you from your foot like finding another thing on your shoulder that also has to be biopsied.”
Something caught her eye and that something was a small black mole.
“I don’t like the look of that at all. How long has that been there?” She said, holding a magnifying glass tool over my shoulder.
“Um, maybe a week or two?” She took out a sharpie and drew little dots around it. Right around that point I began to feel nervous that I had cancer and was going to die.
But you know what they say: “Nothing distracts you from over-the-top feelings of hypochondria like a nurse stabbing between your toes with a needle.”
Cursing is uncivilized and something that should be avoided regularly. Except when some is injecting my toe with a needle. Then I fucking go for it. I cussed in a such a diverse and poetic way that even the nurse was impressed.
Anyway, I can’t do cardio or heavy leg exercises for the next two weeks. Normally, I’d be like, “Yay! Get out of cardio and heavy squat free card!” but during competition prep it’s a bummer.
Hopefully the odd little moles are nothing special. On the bright side though I get to focus on my arms and back, which I haven’t done in a while so I’m looking forward to it.
Whenever I’m dealing with an injury or a setback my go-to mantra is a quote from Theodore Roosevelt: “Do what you can, with what have, where you are.”
It’s a much more positive quote than that of a nurse, which is: “Speak softly and carry a big needle.”
Lisa Traugott is a personal trainer, Mom’s Choice Award writer, original cast member of FOX/John Cena’s “American Grit” and has a monthly fitness column on Bowflex.com. She won Ms. Costa Rica Sports Model 2017 and her transformation story was featured in Muscle & Fitness Hers, Good Day Austin, Great Day Houston and Texas Monthly. She blogs at ShesLosingIt.com and is passionate about her clients.
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