This is Why I Hate Women’s Fitness Magazines
That’s it. I’m done. Women’s fitness magazines drive me NUTS. I used to avoid fitness magazines when I was heavy because the models made me feel like a slacker; discouraged instead of inspired. Now they drive me crazy because I’m hyper-aware of the disconnect between the foods they advertise and the lifestyle they preach.
Men’s fitness magazines don’t do that. I just pulled out six issues of Muscle & Fitness and in each issue there was maybe, MAYBE, one picture of a “forbidden” food coupled with tips for making it healthier or an X through it saying “No!” Yet in this month’s Fitness magazine for women I saw pictures of the following foods packaged as “healthy” choices:
- Goldfish (in “natural” flavors)
- Frosted Mini-Wheats
- Cheese sticks
But this is the advertisement that did me in: McWraps from that health food superstore McDonald’s:
REALLY, FITNESS MAGAZINE!?!? REALLY???
I read your magazine so I can avoid temptations like fast foods and focus on learning about clean eating and yoga butt moves, not so I can see fried chicken, bacon and cheese wrapped in a flour tortilla with a lettuce leaf hat on it packaged as a “healthy” lunch option. Are you trying to f*** with me just for fun?
Then I started thinking of other magazines paired with equally disconnected advertisements:
- Conservative Christian Magazine, brought to you by the Gay Pride Parade. Tickets on sale now!
- Recovering Alcoholics. Today’s recipe? Rum Cake!
- Cutie Pie Kids, brought to you by Gangsta B**** Barbie. (Switchblade and matching body piercing kit sold separately.)
- Natural Bodybuilding E-Zine. Try our new Mega Slop Red Power Ranger Go-Go Juice Stack at ‘Roids ‘R’ Us!
- Celibacy Today. Look for today’s vacation spotlight on Yes! Yes! Yes! Hedonistic Orgy Cruiselines, right after our in depth article titled “Just Say No.”
Does this drive you crazy too?
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