I’m Going to be 50?
When I was 38 I had a bit of a midlife crisis. My business was failing, my marriage was on the rocks, my doctor told me I was borderline obese and that’s when I got the invitation to my 20th high school reunion. Because God has a sense of humor.
Diets never worked for me, and I tried all of them. ALL the diets. As a last resort I decided to do something crazy – sign up for a bodybuilding competition. Ask me what I knew about bodybuilding. Nothing. Absolutely nothing.
Also, I wanted to be a writer.
I began blogging about my training on this blog, ShesLosingIt.com (my husband named the blog) and things began to change. I felt better. I looked better. My confidence grew. My husband and I reconnected and started working as a team again.
As I faced 40 I felt a strong desire to prove to myself that I was competent, sexy, and had the potential to be a badass. Now that I’m staring down 50 all I really want is a clean house and for my kids to grow into happy, well-functioning adults.
Don’t get me wrong, I still truly love bodybuilding, but a soon-to-be fifty-year-old body drastically different from a thirty-eight-year-old body. At 38 there were very real “oops baby?” panic attacks. I held onto my breast pump and lamented the loose skin around my belly. I cared a lot about what other people thought of me.
At almost-50 (my birthday is February 2nd) I have the joy of giving away my unopened boxes of tampons. (And if you’re a man, thank you for reading my blog.) I’m not looking at my belly anymore because I’m too busy staring at my neck. Seriously, WTF happens to a woman’s neck after mid-forty? I now understand why so many middle-aged women wear scarves.
Anyway, my blog is going to have to grow up? old? out? with me. I’m on a quest to learn how to feel good in middle age. By hook or by crook I’m going to do a bodybuilding competition this summer, and I already know the meal plans and workout routines that were successful in the past will need to be adapted to my menopausal body.
I know this is a fitness-specific blog, but I’d like to explore topics beyond just eating clean and exercising. Topics like relationships, anxiety, decluttering, goal-setting, ways to tap into creativity and have more joy in life seem to fit into an expanded idea of ‘wellness’, right? I hope you will join me for this new journey.
How about you? Has your outlook changed as you approach certain milestone birthdays? I’d love to hear in the comments below.
Lisa 😉
Here’s my story. Available here.
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